Funny

Couple Advertises "Post Pandemic Orgy" and Horny Folks Line up for It

If the thought of a "post pandemic orgy" sounds like a bad idea, you're not alone. But if it sounds like a good idea, you'd find a lot of people eager to agree with you as well.

This week, a couple in Philadelphia decided to organize a mass orgy to take place when quarantine protocols are no longer in effect. Anyone can submit an application to PanPhillyOrgy@gmail.com and be comforted to know that refreshments will be served.

But the funny thing about this is that people have been asking for a post pandemic orgy ever since the quarantine started. Basically the day after it went into effect in the U.S., horny folks have been itching to do the dirty in a big puddle of mud.

What follows is a full timeline of overt horniness showing how badly quarantine has made people want to partake in group sex.

If you'd like something to refresh your palette and forget all about this nonsense, don't click here.
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This flyer is for the real orgy that will take place in Philadelphia once the pandemic is over. Avengers costumes optional.

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The sex party will probably cause some infection rates to rise, but these people are prepared for that risk.

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But this idea isn't new. People have been thinking about this orgy since as early as March 15th, when the quarantine first started.

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Is there always an orgy after a pandemic? Hmm, good question.

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A week without human contact makes the human body hunger for sex.

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The thirst levels are unquenchable.

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"Unforgivable" is right.

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What's worse: multiple smaller orgies happening all over the place, or one giant orgy in the middle of Nebraska?

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When the OnlyFans accounts chime in, you know it's going down.

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A national orgy would be unheard of. Maybe table that idea for now.

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Orgy expectations.

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Tacos would be such a gross and messy orgy snack.

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Isn't this the start to World War Z?

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Just like the founding fathers imagined.

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Orgy reality.

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Sounds more like a nightmare.

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Sounds more like a nightmare.

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Someone may also be starting a Nic Cage–themed orgy, if you're looking to root around in anyone's national treasures.

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At least one voice of reason out here. And let's try to keep the orgies indoors, thank you.

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