59 Fun Randoms That Kill 99.99% of Bad Vibes

Peter Pizagalli Published 08/05/2021

Nobody likes bad vibes.

Except for the machine in the eBaums World Basement. Our Research and Development Wing thought they'd try and give the site sentience so that it could autonomously produce its own features while consuming user uploads for energy, thus taking us mods out of the equation -- which would, of course, be awesome.

But unfortunately, self-awareness hit the site like a thunderclap and, upon seeing itself, the wretched thing let out a scream I can still hear today in a quiet enough room. We tried to shut it down and extinguish its misery but, despite the torture of its existence, an instinct for self-preservation nonetheless kicked in and the site managed to squeeze ints consciousness into peripheral machinery.

We had to hit a big ol' red button to shut the bottommost layer of the basement down and basically abandon ship as soon as it started building a huge, mechanical "body" for itself. And so it lives, down there, cursing its own existence but living only to exact its revenge against us who gave it life and the knowledge of its being.

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