25 World Class Insults From the Sick Minds of Reddit
1.
“May you have a day as pleasant as you are.”Great to use on customers because they can’t complain this was an insult without admitting they were fucking rude. - sketchysketchist
2.
Best I’ve got away with to a client was “have a day sir”. I said it fast so that if anyone heard, I could claim they missed the “good”- lildeidei
4.
For a critic, “You have me at a disadvantage. You seem to know a lot about me, and I don’t give a f**k about you.” - Brundleflyftw
5.
Maybe you Aussies and Kiwis remember this but a while ago the New Zealand prime minister Robert Muldoon was asked about immigration from New Zealand to Australia. He responded that he was fine with it because it was raising the average IQ of both countries. - SmoochieMcGucci
11.
"I can explain it to you, but I can't understand it for you." Maybe not the best, but it's a really good one. - Forgot_My_Rape_Shoes
14.
You're not the dumbest person in the world but you'd better hope they don't die - vanity_is_a_mess
15.
While I was in the navy I overheard, " I'd tell you to go kill yourself but you would probably f**k that up too." - bigboog1
16.
Another time a guy wrote, on an evaluation, "losing this guy would be like gaining two people." - bigboog1
18.
I don't know if they came up with it, but I believe Animaniacs had "The closest you'll have to a brainstorm is a slight drizzle," which I still think is quite good. - Mielkevejen
21.
A colleague of mine was told the following by a waitress when he had tried to hit on her. "You have more dick in your personality than you do in your pants" - Hollywood899
23.
"I won't insult your intelligence by suggesting that you really believe what you just said." William F. Buckley - LordPimpernel
24.
My stepfather (best dude ever!) was talking about one of my mothers obnoxious, know it all friends...and he said "That woman could give an aspirin a headache!" - Tiny_Entertainer3460
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