23 Things Designed By Pricks
Nathan Johnson Published 08/11/2021
People are not good. Whether morally or functionally, we do bad things. Or we do things badly. Or both.
Like Hoseah, the uncle of one of our interns. He shows up at the office every few weeks saying that a dogman he once hit with his car in Mexico had caught up to him. "I thought he was dead!" He'd say, "If I knew he was alive, I wouldn't have run off, you know? But good luck explaining that to a pissed-off dogman!"
See, Hoseah is an interesting cat. But Hoseah is also an otherworldly weapons dealer who will sell a plasma cannon to a twelve-year-old for the right price. Hoseah does bad things. But Hoseah would also sell said plasma cannon to a twelve-year-old that is clearly a forty-five-year-old policeman in disguise. Hoseah also does things badly.
These things are designed by people like Hoseah. Bad people who do bad things badly.
Like Hoseah, the uncle of one of our interns. He shows up at the office every few weeks saying that a dogman he once hit with his car in Mexico had caught up to him. "I thought he was dead!" He'd say, "If I knew he was alive, I wouldn't have run off, you know? But good luck explaining that to a pissed-off dogman!"
See, Hoseah is an interesting cat. But Hoseah is also an otherworldly weapons dealer who will sell a plasma cannon to a twelve-year-old for the right price. Hoseah does bad things. But Hoseah would also sell said plasma cannon to a twelve-year-old that is clearly a forty-five-year-old policeman in disguise. Hoseah also does things badly.
These things are designed by people like Hoseah. Bad people who do bad things badly.
2.
“Samsung TV that doesn’t let you uninstall any pre-installed app. Which take up 97% of the TV’s storage….”
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4.
“Mobile game advert adds a fake hair on screen to make you brush it off the screen, bringing you straight to the app store.”
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13.
“NYTimes allows you to sign up easily, but to cancel you have to chat with a sales person.”
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20.
“My uni accommodation’s satisfaction questionnaire has 4/5 “good” ranks and only 1 “bad” rank.”
22.
“Yeaah, naah i don’t, i have eyes and i can see i have 3 matches, tinder just pushing their paid version.”
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