21 Parenting Tips People Wish They Knew Before Having Kids
But don't take it from us, take it from the parents on Reddit who share the things they wish they knew before having kids.
1.
"Make sure your mental health is up to par when they become teenagers. I swear my youngest was going to drive me insane with all the worry she put me through with her mental health after her first bf cheated on her with her best friend after a year of dating." - Daddys__Babygirl
2.
"If you felt invincible at some point in your life, you will never feel that way again. The mere thought of them being harmed in any way can completely destroy you." - ilovelasko
4.
"You have to parent the kid you have. The books are fine for ideas, your experience, friends thoughts, paediatricians, therapists. But at the end of it all you have this complicated little person you’re in charge of with their own preferences, feelings, insecurities, abilities, and you have to do what works for them and your family and, of course, also raise someone who isn’t a blight on humanity or menace to society." - Lilac77777
6.
"I call it "active listening", it is really draining. When there only another adult in the house you don't pay much attention to the everyday noises. With kids you are always listening, are they crying, are they fighting, are they too quiet, what just got opened etc etc. Gets better as they get older but nothing can prepare you for it" - chuppiecabra
7.
"For me, I stopped having a chance to think anything through without interruption. I had a very hard time with that. I couldn’t remember anything, couldn’t make decisions, etc because every thought seemed to get interrupted. I’d just sit in my car alone sometimes so I could think." - ElsieDCow
9.
"Try to remember that your kid is a person, no matter what problems arise. Remember what life was like for you growing up in different stages of your life, and try to empathize whenever possible." - RevolutionaryStart70
10.
"It is one of the two or three most absolute and permanent decisions you can make in life. Once you have kids, you have kids. No going back, no choosing differently, no letting time pass to heal any wounds. Not saying this is good or bad. It's just a permanent decision (if you don't take giving them up for adoption into account)." - Soyuz_Pilot
11.
"When they grow older, you don't have a private life anymore. They stay awake longer than you." - theofiel
12.
"How important the years between 7 and 12 are for building a bond (one that lasts into the teenage years). They are so hard to listen to at that age with all the starts and stops in conversation and they talk about the most boring thing's BUT it is so important to listen and converse at those ages. They will grow into teenagers that will talk to you, and be fun to talk to, but only if you can get through long boring conversations about minecraft or whatever thing they are currently into." - Major-Tomato9191
13.
"I once had to explain to the older child that we don’t touch other people’s private parts while nursing the baby. The boundaries change at different ages and it’s hella confusing for the older one." - DrSnarkyTherapist
14.
"Once they get out of the toddler stage, it can become extremely worrisome and time consuming to parent them to become good people. They start asking questions, and they form their own opinions. It's a very delicate balance between trying to get them to listen to important things and trying to get them to become more independent. It makes you think you are constantly messing it all up. It can be very hard to find a balance." - katedid
15.
"two feet from child watching tv “Child…child….CHILD!!!!!!” What? 5 rooms away whispering super quiet, kid has headphones on watching youtube “so we’re getting him this for Xmas” WHAT AM I GETTING FOR XMAS?! Smh" - Metal-Butterfly
16.
"You will NEVER sleep the same again. It’s just different levels of fear and worries as they get older. Also, I stupidly thought once I had a child I would automatically “know” how to parent. You’re the same dummy before and after having a child, and you realize how much your parents were winging it." - Lividlemonade
17.
"Practicing diapers on a doll doesn't count. You're ready when you can do it on a cat." - Mashy6012
18.
"You can lose who you are while you’re raising them. But it’s so important to take time for yourself to keep this from happening. Also, that you have to teach them to pull their pants up. I knew I would have to teach how to use the potty, eat, tie shoes, etc., but I was so caught off guard about having to explain how to pull pants up when getting dressed. It’s a tricky maneuver for littles." - NashvilleJM
20.
"Everything you say or do is being watched and shaping the personality of another human being and if you duck up, you duck them up as well." - LaLaBeDa
21.
"How fucking hard it is, even in the best of circumstances. I’m a single mom of two - one with lung disease - and I’m just completely overwhelmed and stressed all the time. I love my kids so freaking much, but life is really hard." - Stormblessed1022
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