20 Samples of Women Writing Male Characters and the Cringe That Follows

1.

The grey sweatpants crowd loves this headline. But honestly I'd totally love it if my penis was just 'hey fatty, let's go for a walk.' Unfortunately that's not how the world works.

2.

"Derek withdrew his dampened and moist t-shirt from his sweaty body. She could see the reflection of the stars in the glistening pools that had gathered under his pectoral muscles."

3.

Yes, because every man I've ever seen or interacted with (including myself) has the proportions of the Hulk.

4.

To be fair, we are all horndogs. Some men are just better at controlling/hiding it than others. Keep doing you, BuzzFeed.

5.

What man has ever said this? I'm genuinely curious.

6.

LOL. Because one person making more money than their partner triggers this kind of reaction. To clarify, that's sarcasm. No it doesn't.

7.

What does that even mean? What color is that??? Is he literally Shrek?

8.

This was an actual chart handed out during a birthing class.

9.

Ahh yes, my favorite types of lubricant. Vaseline, Durex, and "Anticipation."

10.

"They have their reasons."

11.

This is the only type of book that moms over 40 will ever read.

12.

I mean, this isn't wrong. I just like a lot of other things in addition to beer, and boobs, and hamburgers, and chicken wings, and televised sports.

13.

Not gonna lie though, as ridiculous as this sounds this pick-up line would have worked on me in college.

14.

This whole passage.

15.

Alright, I've had enough.

16.

What on earth is a tomato scrotum? Also I can confirm that my scrotum doesn't typically steam after a bath, but that's just me.

17.

Lost me at 'Downbeat Chicago pizza joint.'

18.

Hey aspiring writers. Never put 'swelled breast' and 'instantly hard' (or any iteration of those things) in the same sentence.

19.

AHHH yes. I remember dreaming of those nips as a baby.

20.

That seems like an overreaction.

21.

That's my first thought when I see two guys hanging out. They must be gay.