18 Examples of 'Dickriding' Previously Thought Unimaginable

A viral prompt by Twitter user Jhonny, asking, "What's the craziest dickriding y'all ever seen?" received over 99 million views and tens of thousands of responses – eliciting some all-time examples of "dickriding" (ass-kissing) the internet has ever seen. 

"Paying for Twitter Blue" was one of the most common responses, as it should be, but in the thousands of quotes and spin-off threads, we were able to find levels of ass-kissing only fathomable by the good lord himself. 

What you are about to experience can only be described as a collection of the addest people to ever walk the Earth, may God have mercy on their souls.