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10 Things you Need To Keep Your Man Card From Getting Revoked

Products to help you bluff your way right into alpha male status.

1.

Make sure everyone who comes over knows about your respect for furniture and exactly where you stand on the whole "should I use a coaster?" situation. $14.99 Get it HERE.

2.

100 Deadly Skills a book that is exactly what it sounds like. From surviving being taken hostage, to the zombie apocalypse, these skills will pretty much get you out of any screwed up situation you manage to get yourself into. $11.99 Get it HERE.

3.

Are you trying to get SWOLE with little to no success? Get yourself some protien powder and leave the excuses at home. This 5lb jug of premium powder is available in 16 different flavors and engineered to build muscle, fast. $54.99 Get it HERE.

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4.

Sometimes you're just in the mood for a smoke. Nothing can stand in your way, including the wind or the rain with the Sparq Plasma lighter. Rechargable and butane free, this badass lighter will get the job done, every single time. $16.99 Get it HERE.

5.

Put your maniless to the test with these Haunted Ghost Pepper Tortilla Chips. If you don't turn beet red and pass out, you'll definitely look like a total badass! $6.99 Get it HERE.

6.

Some people wear their heart on their sleeve. Now you can do the same, except with this badass "You Son of a Bitch" patch you can wear it on your sleeve, your chest, your back, or wherever the hell you damn well please! $8.99 Get it HERE.

7.

You're a chill dude. You couldn't care less... Hell when challenged you rip your shirt off and scream how much you "don't give a f**k!" Take the art of not caring to a whole new level with this handy book "The subtle art of not giving a f*ck". $14.99 Get it HERE.

8.

Who doesn't love some ramen noodles? Don't eat the plain 'ole wuss-flavored chicken beef and shrimp style ramen, man the hell up and get some 2x spicy hot chicken flavored ramen in your mouth and feel good for once. $8.99 (5 Pack) Get it HERE.

9.

Make sure every single damn photo you take makes you look like the Adonis you truly are (or atleast pretend to be). With this 5-in-1 camea lens attatchmen (complete with 12x zoom) you're photos are sure to have muscles bulging you didn't even know you have! $28.99 Get it HERE.

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10.

Maybe you're an alpha male, maybe you constantly reek of a mix of sweat, testosterone and axe body spray. For the rest of us, there's a pheromone cologne that is the essense of chemistry's best attempt at manliness in a 15ml bottle. "Scientifically proven" likely means a non-fda tested forumula that is ethically questionable at best. $29.99 Get it HERE.

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