The only thing crappier than getting arrested? Pooping your pants while getting arrested.
This tale of double whammy woe was an unfortunate reality for one man, whose encounter with the pigs took a turn for the crappy after he shat his pants while trying to evade arrest.
While we were fortunately spared from the graphic, gory visuals of a grown man dropping a deuce in broad daylight, he made sure to paint a very clear picture, describing what, exactly, was going on in his nether regions.
“I’m shitting on myself!” he screamed as the officers pinned him down onto the sidewalk in front of what appeared to be a convenience store. “I’m shitting on myself!”
This poopy proclamation, however, failed to deter the two officers from getting up close and personal with the purported purp’s behind, a sentiment several Redditors took note of r/PublicFreakout.
“Everyone thinks its just fight or flight, they forgot about the 3rd option...shite,” wrote u/DarkMatrix445.
“‘We’re gonna have to arrest you, but your dinner is free to go,’” joked u/GospelofJawn316, while u/SuienReizo commended the man for “using his self-defeces skills.”
But whether or not the alleged offender was set free — much like his most recent meal — there is one thing we absolutely do know: Those cops’ squad car must have smelled crazy.
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