At some point in the last week, German Chancellor Olaf Scholz fell while jogging in his hometown of Potsdam, sustaining several injuries in the process. Or is that just what they *want* us to believe?
Conspiracy theorists love when a famous person shows up with an injury. For example, when Barack Obama’s personal chef Tafari Campbell drowned in July, conspiracy theorists passed around images of the former president with tape on his hands to imply that he personally killed Campbell. Not sure why he wouldn’t have just hired someone else to do it, but some conspiracy theorists don’t always have the firmest grips on reality.
On that note, many online aren’t convinced that the German chancellor actually fell while jogging. Instead, they say, he’s joined a secret club with a very famous first rule.
“Somebody joined a very special club,” wrote a user. In case readers weren’t aware of what this was referring to, every other commenter in the thread made it easy by making the same three Fight Club references. In short, people think Scholz gets off on punching and being punched.
Sure, some people in this thread were almost certainly joking. However, others referenced something called The “Black Eye” Club — a theory that suggests that celebrities getting black eyes is all part of one big plan to… do… something.
Essentially, there are a few main camps with this theory. The first says that celebrities getting a single black eye is a not-so-subtle reference to the Illuminati’s Eye of Providence. The second believes that black eyes are a consequence of a surgery either to put chips into famous people’s heads or to remove their soul from their body. There’s also a third group who thinks that celebrities sometimes show up with black eyes after their handlers keep their egos in check by beating them. Doesn’t sound fun no matter which way you shake it!
While this may seem a bit — I don’t know, stupid? — a few Redditors seem absolutely convinced. “Black eye club, period. Even the pope is a member lol,” wrote one user. “Just look how happy he is. He finally got it he is finally in the black eye club. Damn, he wanted this all his life and now he is in such a great day for germans,” detailed a second. “They completed his initiation. The mother fucker likely had some creature implanted into his brain through there,” stated a third.
Sure, the more likely answer to why some of the thousands of celebrities in the world today have a black eye is that it’s pretty easy to get a black eye. But if you want to believe that German Chancellor Olaf Scholz has a fight club with Emmanuel Macron and the rest of the who’s-who of European politics, no one’s going to fight you about it.
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