There comes a time in nearly every woman’s life when she has to come to grips with a truly gut-wrenching realization: No matter what angles you choose, your partner will always — and I mean *always* — see your asshole during sex.


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A concept that has sparked terror — and insecurity — in anyone involved in penetrative sex since as long as the internet has been the internet, it seems men, too, are not immune from reality-shifting realizations surrounding their own sexuality. In particular, your partners can always smell it when you’ve been jerking off thanks to good ‘ol pheromones.



Despite making the rounds on Reddit, dumb meninist blogs (Roosh, if you’re reading this, please suck my dick)  and even peak douchebag-era MTV over the past several years, earlier this week, a Twitter user — nay, hero — by the absolutely badass name of @UsingCigarettes took to the social platform with an equally harrowing reminder for men.


“It’s so funny when a girl on here reminds guys that we can all smell if they’ve jacked off recently and all the guys start to cope by pretending it’s a joke,” they mused in a tweet that has since garnered more than 30,000 likes.


As some users in the comments likened the realization to “a shark smelling blood in the water,” and others questioned whether the tweet was a joke (it’s not). 


Meanwhile, some proclaimed they used this hormonal shift to their own advantage. “I jack off with this exact intent (before going to therapy etc),” read one reply.




So dudes, if you’re reading this, go out and get so—  wait, never mind. Goals are supposed to be realistic.