Sometimes being in a relationship means learning about all of your partner’s idiosyncrasies and choosing to love them anyway, but sometimes it means learning about your partner’s idiosyncrasies and roasting them online because you’re baffled beyond belief.


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A British man recently took to Twitter to share that his partner “sometimes” throws their teaspoons out when she takes them to work with her because she can’t be bothered washing them. “Now my head is on Mars,” he wrote. “I don’t think I can look her in the eyes again without wanting to spit on her.”



In a follow-up tweet, he revealed that he had decided to hide the couple’s last three teaspoons around the house so that the next time she needs to use one, “she’ll have to inconvenience herself with table spoons.”


Truly a fate worse than death.



His partner then texted him asking where all the teaspoons were, and the fact that she even has to ask is concerning and betrays an alarming lack of self-awareness. Ma’am, you cannot be trusted with teaspoons. Your punishment will be to only use plastic ones for the rest of your life, and then to plant 100 trees in turn to make up for using all of that plastic.


According to the man’s replies, his partner doesn’t see what the big deal is, and had been doing the same thing when she lived with her mom at home. Why has nobody sat her down and told her this is the behavior of a psychopath before now? If you love someone, you owe it to them to tell the truth.