Roughly five months after Elon Musk’s paid verification initiative launched 1,000 terrible impersonations, a whole lot of confusion and may have inadvertently led to Eli Lily lowering the price of insulin (kinda rad, tbh) it seems the Tesla mogul has learned jack shit about what happens when users can’t distinguish whether a Twitter Blue subscriber and a legacy verified account.


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On Saturday, April 1, the platform tried to make good on its controversial promise of “winding down our legacy verified program,” per a statement from their verified page,  instead of removing check marks from those unwilling to pay (with the notable exception of the New York Times’ main account) Twitter’s overlords opted for a much more disorienting approach – removing any indication of whether a user is a legacy verification or is a dipshit willing to cough up $8 per month.



With this new distinction blurring the lines between reality and bad (but highly amusing) fan fiction, the social site regressed back to its November 2022 state,  devolving into absolute chaos.


From a faux Gwyneth Paltrow account alleging that she celebrated her recent court victory by setting her $1 winning “on fire in front of a poor person,” to a Matt Walsh imposter proclaiming that “every trans man is better at sex than me” and Rolling Stone’s Miles Klee, getting booted from the site after impersonating NASA with a banger tweet proclaiming that “we killed some aliens,” all hell broken loose.



Even Musk wasn’t immune to the chaos. As the phony posts began pouring in, one user shared a heartfelt tweet speculating as to why he made such an evidently bewildering decision for the floundering site.





“Taking everyone check marks, do you think my kids will finally think I’m strong?” mused an imposter in a post that garnered upwards of 37,000 views.



So, while Elon may be an idiot and a terrible CEO, he's our idiot, and the CEO Twitter deserves. Whether you want to admit it or not.