He doesn’t wear a face mask to hide his identity, he tats that s**t up to proclaim it. Where other heroes might don a utility belt or oddly sexualized pair of spandex underpants, he carries with him his trusty plastic bag full of stolen chicken fingers and a loaded handgun. At his disposal is no batmobile, no grappling hook (or shirt), and absolutely zero f**ks to give about the social contract.
He is Florida Man, the internet superhero who we all, in some sick way, would love to be for just a day.
Down below, we've got the best Florida Man memes, the funniest Florida Man headlines and a wee bit of history about the great and unequivocal Florida Man and the internet swampland from whence he came.
Where Did Florida Man Come From?
How much radioactive waste and bath salts need come together in one gator-infested section of the everglades to produce our misguided superhero, Florida Man? Hard to say.
Seriously, if you're wondering where all the funny Florida Man headlines come from and why there isn't a 'Maine Man' or 'Ohio Woman', there’s actually a very specific reason for that: Florida’s 1991 ‘Sunshine Law’. This specific piece of legislation provides increased public access to a wide swath of government records -- including arrest records.
Thus, many offended Floridians -- when not engaged in drunken fistfights on mini-golf courses -- can seek solace in the knowledge that the rest of the country is actually no less wild than the resident Florida Man.
It’s just easier for “journalists” to scour arrest records for interesting cases that make attention-grabbing headlines. Speaking of which…
20 Funny Florida Man Headlines that Live Up to the Meme
Ah, Florida Man. Where would we be without your alligator-throwing, flying-squirrel-smuggling, police cruiser-stealing persona? Indeed, not a day goes by that some hilarious, WTF-infused Florida Man headline doesn’t work its way into our feed. Maybe that just says a lot about us.
1. What was he saving it for? Florida Man Meter: 7/10. The strangeness bumps it up a point or two, as does the involvement of aquatic life and fast food.
2. One can only hope their Visa laws are pretty lax. Florida Man Meter: 6.5/10. It would probably score more points if he hadn't technically rendered himself a 'Fapistan Man.'
3. There's a good chance he's doing time anyway. Florida Man Meter: 5/10. Lacking any property damage or injury bumps it down a couple points.
4. Remember, this dude's vote counts just as much as yours. Florida Man Meter: 5/10.
5. We can only assume the devil is in the details. Florida Man Meter: 6.5/10. The extra half a point is for the copious amounts of alcohol involved.
6. To be fair, this is as straightforward a Florida Man headline as you're going to get. Florida Man Meter: a solid 7.5/10. The characteristic nakedness earns it an extra half a point.
7. That sounds suspiciously like the dream my therapist told me I'm not allowed to talk about anymore. Florida Man Meter: 7/10.
8. Strong contender for Florida Man of the Decade. Florida Man Meter: 9/10. He might've earned himself a perfect 10/10 if more drugs/alcohol and deadly weapons were involved. Plus he doesn't have a single face tat.
9. To each his own. Florida Man Meter: 4.5/10. He loses a few points for trying to bang a snowman -- seems very anti-Floridian. Unless it was meant to serve as an act of dominance, perhaps.
10. It's hard to interpret her expression here, but kudos to them for finding true love at the expense of an exit. Florida Man Meter: 5/10.
11. I'd love to hear his thoughts on what constitutes "good foot smell." Florida Man Meter: 6/10.
12. How would you even ask for that haircut? Florida Man Meter: 8.5/10. Alabama Man Meter: 9/10.
13. Why does Florida man keep ditching his costume? Florida Man Meter: 8/10.
14. I honestly want to try that doorknob. Florida Man Meter: 7.5/10.
15. Very uncool. Eat it or leave it, man. Florida Man Meter: 3.5/10.
16. His marketing strategy, to be fair, is probably better than our own (i.e. he has one). Florida Man Meter: 8.5/10. We've got Florida Man's characteristic ballsiness, drugs, police activity, and the gumption that every Florida Man needs. The only thing holding him back is the distinct lack of chaos.
17. A modern-day samurai. Did he explain the joke to the guy before trying to shower him with Kindness? Florida Man Meter: 9/10.
18. Lucky bastard. Florida Man Meter: 6/10.
19. This guy needs a pair of Chuck Norris 'Action Jeans'. Florida Man Meter: 7.5/10.
20. Not even close to the worst thing I've seen a gator eat. Florida Man meter: 9.5/10. The far-seeing squint makes all the difference.
Florida Man Memes
Memes come and go. Kind of like Furbies and fidget spinners, one second Vin Diesel’s popping up everywhere looking out for his family and the next we’re on to whatever cringeworthy thing Netflix is up to next, meme-ing it into oblivion.
But not Florida Man. The omnipotent Florida Man has stood the test of time.
1. An honorary Florida Man from another School of WTF.
2. Wyoming Man sounds like a good time.
3. Yet another reason not to cuddle afterward.
4. Honestly not what I expected South LA man's power to be but I'll take it.
5. One second, the Florida Man Meter just shattered in my hands.
6. That poor alligator is about to get rekt.
7. And nobody could blame them.
8. Florida Man would probably open the Arc of the Covenant like he'd open a fridge.
9. Florida Man is anything but shy.
10. The Florida is strong in this one.
11. Last I checked, Hurricane Matthew was gone. Florida Man isn't.
12. You can see the flames currently being emitted by the Florida Man Meter from outer space. Florida Man/10.
13. Post-Florida clarity is real.
14. I'd still bet the house on Florida Man.
15. It's an acquired taste.
16. I'm calling BS on this one. That's far too much clothing and safety awareness for a true Florida Man.
17. Well, here we are.
18. Trust me, Batman. You don't want any of this.
19. Well, Florida Men have to come from somewhere.
20. Is this the origin story of the Florida Man who was scaring Satan earlier?
Florida Man Encounters
As much as we all love static images and meme dumps, you really need moving images and sound to capture the utter chaos that Florida Man is capable of. If we're going to go this deep on Florida Man (looking at you, SEO team), we're going to need some video evidence of this demigod's historic feats.
1. Here we see a cop deeply concerned that Florida Man's children might accidentally hurt an alligator. Florida Man meter: 8/10.
2. Florida Man sees a problem and he solves it the most Florida way possible. Florida Man Meter: a resounding 9.5/10.
3. Never look in a Florida Man's pockets. Florida Man Meter: 9/10. We've got all the ingredients of full-blown Florida Man at work here.
4. Not sure if I can get away with any of the puns that come to mind for this one. Florida Man Meter: 9/10.
5. The trash can is to protect the alligator before the Florida inside Florida Man comes out. Florida Man 7/10.
6. Florida Man is so ballsy, he literally encased himself in a ball and decided to run across an ocean. Florida Man Meter: 6/10. It loses a few points for the complete absence of crime, drugs, violence or police.
7.With skin of bronze and clad in the livery of a beater of wives, Florida man puts his hidden talents on display. Florida Man Meter: 5.5/10.
8. Feeding an ancient apex predator Chips Ahoy? That's right Florida Man, that's right. Florida Man Meter: 9.5/10.
9. With cops, fury, tropical weather and jail time that could've been avoided by a few second's thought, we have a fully-grown Florida Man here. Florida Man Meter: 9/10.
10. I mean that's just a cool, run-of-the-mill Florida Man clip. I'm honestly out of punchy copy at this point and the deadline for this piece looms. Let's finish this up and get out of here. Florida Man Meter: 8/10.
How Did Florida Man Get Started?
The internet’s obsession with the earth’s loosest cannon, Florida Man, is seemingly as old as the internet itself. That said, we can point to a few specific moments that forever crystallized Florida Man as the omnipotent wild man that he is.
In 2013, the OG Florida Man Twitter account was set up, publishing some of the funniest Florida Man headlines on the internet and garnering tens of thousands of followers in its first month alone. The account has been inactive, however, since late 2019 after becoming more politics-oriented than its original conception.
Because the internet is a copycat-generator, however, Twitter, Instagram, TikTok and plenty of other social media platforms are abounded with accounts posting Florida Man’s latest exploits and misadventures. #FloridaMan has half a billion views on TikTok alone, just for starters.
Florida Man Birthday Challenge
The Florida Man Birthday Challenge was first explained to me by a vastly overqualified cashier at Trader Joe’s who was, himself, a proud Florida Man. When asked, “What is the Florida Man thing?” he proceeded to tell me, at length, while people behind me in line waited, that the Florida Man Birthday challenge was a fun and somewhat derogatory game that involved googling your birthday and seeing what crazy Florida Man headline pops up.
Who Invented Florida Man?
Much of the credit for popularizing the Florida Man Birthday Challenge is attributed to Tumblr user ‘gandalfsoda’ who published a post in 2019 calling for users to search for ‘Florida Man’ followed by their birth date, with the aim to see what sort of hijinks Florida Man was up to on their birthday. The post went viral on the platform before spreading like wildfire across Twitter, where user @g_pratimaaa tweeted out the same challenge. The Tweet blew up, eventually being featured on the Twitter Moments page where it caught the attention of mainstream news outlets who took it and ran with it, amplifying its popularity in the general, offline public as well.
Is It "Okay" to Laugh at Florida Man?
As undeniably hilarious as many a Florida Man news headline and meme is, many in the media have begun to speculate whether it’s ethically permissible to laugh at Florida Man's exploits -- considering the context of many of his more “offbeat” adventures typically involves violence, crime, drugs and other less-than-upstanding behavior. Let's not forget that one of the OG Florida Man moments was him literally chewing a dude’s face off while high on bath salts.
That said, instead of wasting time debating whether or not it's funny, be the judge yourself. Did you laugh? Maybe it's funny. Or maybe it isn't and you have a twisted sense of humor that you are 100% entitled to. If you want to get all high and mighty, and you're seriously reading a paragraph about the moral implications of propagating the Florida Man meme on eBaums World, you'd probably be better off saving your concern for why Florida Man even exists in the first place -- and not policing other people's sense of humor. Florida Man, in an ideal world, doesn't exist.
But we don't live in an ideal world. We live in a ridiculous dumpster fire of a world full of crazy sh*t. That's what first spawned eBaums World from the depths of the internet: to serve as an encyclopedia of cool and crazy sh*t.
Florida Man is humanity unsanitized. He's what happens when you unleash a primate in a glittering world full of technology, alligators, and airboats. And he is, in our opinion, one of the most captivating and honest players on the world's stage.
And we're here to record him and all the other detritus inside the dumpster fire so that the aliens, while picking through the irradiated, still-smoking wreckage of humanity, can see the real us.
Comments